According to Wikipedia, jealousy is an emotion, and the word typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something of great personal value, particularly in reference to a human connection. There happens to be many forms of jealousy but I am going to touch on sexual jealousy in humans.
When we mention jealousy, what comes first to the minds of many individuals especially from our side of the world is the picture of a woman pulling the hair of another woman or cursing her man because he may be involved sexually with another woman. Yes women are jealous beings but men are worse. We do not often see the worse nature of jealousy in men because most societies ban women from engaging in affairs with more than one man. Of course you know there are some who do not follow this rule and so become social misfits and or are beaten by their men and thrown out of their family houses or dumped. But once in a while, when cases involving jealous men are brought to the fore, it is worse.
I will say that whoever or whatever made us, created us in such a way that, we hate to share our sexual intimacies with other people, no matter the gender. So those in love love the one man one woman rule. Even those who say they are not jealous cannot stand public display of affection between their lovers and their lovers’ lovers. Why? Because that tendency of betrayal nudges you in loins once you see it. So it is not that you are not jealous, you just have a better way of controlling your emotions or you are simply too proud.
Now since humans are greedy by nature and our greed is stirred by abundance and many researches show that women are in abundance, what is a woman to do so as not to find herself in unpardonable situations caused by jealousy?
One would think that since we all acknowledge the fact that there is an emotion called jealousy and that it is an unpleasant feeling, we would come together and stop provoking it. But no, humans, I always say are very complex beings. Some are happy just by stirring jealousy in the faces of their loved ones or their ex-loved ones.
Here I am, a woman who has two children with a man who no longer desires me and wishes to leave me for another. The burning desire of anger can cause me to commit murder so as to refrain from seeing what belongs to me in the possession of another. But after that there are repercussions.
The state will come in and will not see the fact that you were wronged as a justification for your misdemeanor and will prosecute you, unless you prosecute yourself by taking your own life after that. But in that case, what happens to your loved ones and/or the children?
Either way it is a bad idea to fly on the wings of passions of jealousy. This is because we are in a world that allows freedom in many acts, acts of homosexuality that cannot produce a human being. (And I am not trying to look down on them; I respect them for the lives they choose for themselves) This is an era where many dramas show the woman or the man who prevents people who love each other from being together as the villain, and you know there are many drama lovers all around the world. So how can you prevent someone who does not find you alluring anymore from leaving you?
The answer is there is no solution. If he or she means to leave you, even if you kill the person whom you think serves as the stumbling block in your relationship, he will find you more disgusting. And will rally behind the state to kill or imprison you for life.
You’ve been wronged yes. Your heart hurts, no doubt, you wouldn’t be a human being if it didn’t, you feel like killing yourself yes, but if you let that feeling conquer you, then you are no different from the woman or man who has been beaten by a toddler. I mean to say you are a COWARD. A big fat coward because you couldn’t hold onto the struggle of life! What is life without a little heartbreak? What is life without pain? Life is woven around conflicts, the more you are caught up in conflicts, the tougher you become and the stronger you’ll grow earning the respect of even your enemies.
So the best way is to look your best even as you walk through the exit with your heart on fire and the bitterness forming tears that look for a gate-way through your eyes. This way, you maintain your greatness and your adorability and most importantly, your dignity!
Amoafowaa Sefa Cecilia © 2014.